Day Seven

DAY 7

The Reason for Everything

Bringing Glory to God

I heard it said once “If there is no GOD, who made that tree?” And what really gets me is the BIG BANG theory. OK SO something in space went BANG. Something collided. WHO MADE THE SOMETHING THAT COLLIDED? It doesn’t take a bunch of over educated and over paid scientist to figure that one out. A universe and planets that just happens to rotate around each other and make a bunch of countries all try to be the first to figure out WHY? And all from a BIG Anonymous BANG? And yet the homeless are starving in the USA and the kids in school have no pencils but we have men in space trying to figure out what is on a planet and what it is made of and that is more important to our government. Where is the REASON in that my Father?

I have always loved the sunsets, and yet artists try to recreate them. Any scenic view is always something any painter wants to copy, why? Because they are the most beautiful of the creations God has given us to enjoy every evening to say Good Night. Sleep now, your day is done. Look up remember me before you lie down. I promise to do it again tomorrow. OH YEA, wait until sunrise. As if it all just happens by chance. Come on DARWINites, get real. When I think of DARWINites I see a bunch of Ostriches standing around with their head stuck in the sand. If they would just pull their heads OUT, they could see the beauty of everything. But they are looking in the wrong place.

So what can I do to bring Glory to God? How can I start? When can I start? Right out of bed. Like I said before in a previous day’s writings, it used to be as soon as I woke up I would reach for the Menthol’s and go through half a pack before I ever put a foot on the floor. Then I would move from the bed to the living room to the chair in front of the television and finish the first pack before I even fed myself. I think the nicotine really did curb my appetite. No wonder I weighed in at 130 lbs. Healthy . . . NOT! SAD > > >YES! Worshipful, to whom? What a wonderful way to start the day. So what is a worshipful way to start the day? How about a shower? And not just jumping in and getting wet and getting out, but getting in and enjoying the fact that you are actually taking care of what there is left of my body and finding those nooks and crannies that have never seen soap and water before. Whose body. HIS BODY. Now as for the nicotine that is history. Four packs a day of history. I started late at the age of 28 when I was being codependent with Camacho and lighting them for him and decided to be like him and have one. Twenty years of bondage, mostly to Marlboro. And they had no COFFINS to buy with those MILES on the side of each pack either. They should, that would have at least been worth it? Well after that shower there is more ways to worship. For me it my spirit that I need to feed. And the best way for me is at the gift God gave me at the age of five. Sit down at the keys of my piano or Roland XP. God has written so many songs with me. Some are prayers; some are songs of healing, while others are just songs of joy and laughter and bring out the energy in me to motivate my day. ALL IN ALL, it makes way for all of heaven to get its act in motion to move in my life for the whole day. Eating is something that has been a chore in the past for me. Not that it is hard to eat physically or hard to keep the food down, it was just I had no desire to get to the kitchen to spend the time fixing any thing. If someone had been there to be my slave and do for me I would have eaten but to do it for myself, the cigarettes just took that place. But the mornings you will find me not just making breakfast but preparing food for the day. So when I want to eat again later, it is ready. No one ever said I was never prepared. Especially now that the days are full and once I get going time is short and it is much easier if I cook once and just have to heat it up quick style later. But I do very much enjoy the morning time in the kitchen. Quiet, peaceful, and Good Food.

So after I take care of the body of Mike, what about using who I just took care of for others? After all, God did not give me his grace and mercy to keep me here just to clean and feed myself day after day. Even today, March 22, 2008 I am getting compliments on my looks at age 47. The new hair cut, the weight gain people are noticing. Steve said I looked 20 years younger today when I visited him in jail. His eyes are much clearer and he had only ever seen me with that long curly hair down my back so the Mike he sees now is brand new to him. But Rick Warren is right when he says that worship is more than just singing and praising. I did a lot of stuff out there and in private with who I was to myself and with other people that was not right, that was very much the enemies calling instead of God’s purpose. So now, all that energy I had before, the ability to reach anyone for selfish purposes where ever I went, with whoever I chose, why should I be any different for GOD? I am still Mike, the man with the gift of persuasion. Once satan inspired now GHOST inspired. And what a difference. In the past after getting all the enemy offered me or getting what I wanted, I got something that I never wanted, all the guilt. That was what I went to bed with, woke up with, suffered day in and day out with. It was what I slammed speed into my arm over, it what I filled up the spoon with. But now the opposite of that is JOY. PRIDE. SATISFACTION. Three things that were so far out of reach that it was no wonder I was always searching and reaching for things that seemed so distant. Now they just seem to show up every time I do anything. One thing I have come to enjoy is when the phone rings and it is a church member, her name is Madalyn and her first words on the phone are “Mike. Do you want to pray? It’s a whole lot better than “Mike you got a DUB?” (a DUB is a 20 dollar sack of marijuana, and I used to sell them which is also how I got myself into the position to be held up at knife point 3 times, in my wheel chair, can you imaging the nerve of some fools robbing a man in a wheelchair?) I can see that the person God created me to be was always in there, I just needed to learn how to use those qualities in the right directions and in the correct manner that would bring out the best results. IE: getting robbed or feeling JOY. It’s not a hard choice anymore.

Gifts are another wonderful blessing that we all like to receive. Whether it’s on a birthday or a holiday, they always bring excitement. But how long do they usually last? As a child we either wear them out as we grow or get tired of them when the next new toy comes along and our desires are enticed some more. But if the gift is from God it is for a lifetime. It will never wear out. There will never be a something better that comes along next year. It will never go out of style. And it will only get better the more it is used. Stronger and more evident and more needed the more we engage it over and over again. And the blessings and the joy every time we have the opportunity to use it because when we do will only bring so much Glory to God that heaven can’t resist raining down on us. And people grip over not getting that Christmas bonus they were waiting for. BOO HOO! Finding out our gifts takes time. Sometimes for me it was getting compliments over and over again for the same things to realize what I was good at or what I was always getting recognized for to understand what they are. The first one was my ability to play the piano. At the age of five I was at my grandmother’s piano playing by ear. By high school I didn’t need lessons any more, just an audience. God gave me this talent, it was in my blood I guess because of my grandmother as she was the pianist for her church as I was growing up. But it wasn’t until I was thirty for that I remember writing the first song that God gave that had anything to do with Him or my life. Since then there have been many more, and after I bought my Roland XP at thirty four just after I was released from the hospital with my spinal cord injury, has my musical talent really come into its prime and the creations that God has given me to express myself have only been to say the least a way of for me to worship in a most powerful way in the mornings. It can also drive my neighbors crazy in the afternoons if I don’t have my headphones on. The gift of encouragement and hospitality use to come out in a way of people pleasing with the wrong motives. If I could butter someone up with the proper affection to GET AFFECTION or spend lots of money on someone to get the love of someone that I wanted, well, was I getting what I wanted? Were my needs really getting met? I thought so. Well as long as I kept up the charade it was. But quit with all that, run out of spoils for them, where did they go? Anywhere but to me. So who is it that is doing it now? Is it still me or the Spirit of God inside me? I have always loved people. Making them happy as always made me happy. I don’t expect anything in return except knowing that I have done something for them that they could not do for themselves. God has blessed me in so many ways. Why do I have and others do not have? How can I NOT GIVE what I have been given for free? I used to DREAM of the day I didn’t have to work and could sit around all day and just get high and not worry about work or responsibility. That day came but the responsibility was still there. And the DANGER increased. And the responsibility of WHO I WAS doing the partying with, and what trouble they were bringing on me was worse that being able to relax and enjoy it. But now my time is MY TIME. And who ever comes into my life wasn’t brought there by me anymore, it is HIS choosing. I trust God to make those decisions now. And if there is no one, that means it is HIM AND ME and that is just fine with me. I can never get enough time alone with just US. LIKE RIGHT NOW. My days are so full of either the needs of my home and my animal family (and that is a ZOO and a half) or if I have appointments and the time I spend getting to and from with the way I spend talking and the extra time God has me out there, you see I LOVE THE STREETS. They are where I came from, where I played for the devil and where I shame him the most, KNOCKING OUT DEMONS ONE TWO THREE! He thought he was playing games with me before and laughing. Well look who’s crying now! What’s fair is fair and it’s my turn to get some, and GOD’S.

I used to think life was boring after the end of drugs and sex, what else could there be to life? WHAT A STUPID THING TO FEEL. I used to be angry about being in a wheel chair and bitter. But without a car and having to walk and take the bus, it’s a lot faster in a Quickie than my feet. HA HA! Plus at 47 and the way I feel about being 47 and enjoying the ministry of youth and kids, anything to be cool to them, like a great big air horn to get their attention just gives me one more tool to use to minister with. I don’t think a walker would do the trick.

In all of this, in every part of my life I see GOD. In my hygiene, in my attention to my home, the friends I keep, the friends God gives me. Where ever I go, God is there, who ever I run into, God is directing my paths and putting just who wants to in front of me. Believe me when I say I am a change man only because I am HIS CREATION. He is my Creator. I am becoming what God has planned me to be to show the world HIM. I pray that when other see me, talk with me, that they are experiencing HIM in some form or fashion. Please Lord, continue to change me mold me and shape me into your likeness daily. Make me YOU in a very unique way. Can you see GOD with an Iguana on His shoulders, I CAN!